Have you ever experienced something in your life, but you’re petrified to share it? There’s a saying- the truth shall set you free. But what if the truth is holding you captive? What if telling the truth is the most frightening and difficult thing you’ve ever had to do? Does that mean you should keep it to yourself?
I’ve battled these questions in my head for a while. And every time I ask myself, I come to the same conclusion. Just because telling the truth, in its entirety, is difficult and may even cause serious repercussions, does not mean you shouldn’t tell it.
I’ve been keeping this thing so close to my chest for several years now. Concerning myself with what others might think. Worrying that those around me might see me differently. Afraid of what might be said. Might. Might. Might. Ever fixated on the elusive might. Rather than use my situation as a catalyst for growth, I’ve done the very thing I should never do – keep quiet and allow my circumstances to consume me. What started off as a secret, has transformed into a weight that continually bears down on my spirit. No more, I tell myself. It’s finally time to speak up.
But, every time I think I’ve gathered enough courage, I can’t find my voice. So, I keep it in and feel ashamed. Ashamed that I don’t have the courage to speak up. Fearful of what may happen if I do, yet even more fearful of what may continue if I don’t. And this vicious cycle continues on repeat. After many conversations with those close to me and bounds of encouragement, I have decided to break my own silence.
As I embark on this journey, I realize that I am not just telling this story for me. This is not about getting something off my chest. This is about telling a story that is not just my own, because I know I am not the only one living it. This is truly about a journey, not a destination.
I would like to say thank you to my close circle for supporting me through this. For loving me when I’ve made it difficult and for incessant encouragement and support. And to those willing to join me on this journey, thank you.